Jan 9, 2007
Kleiman Kinema Klub:
Every year my friend Bailey and I pick some horrible reality/game show to watch. In the past we’ve picked “The Apprentice” and “Unan1mous”, but the one we picked recently has most certainly taken the cake, and shit all over it. I’m talking about the NBC show “Identity”.
This is the show with host Penn Gillette, of Penn and Teller semi fame, where the contestant has to identify the profession or characteristic of twelve guests based purely on what they see.
For example, they have to guess who the sushi chef is or which person is the Las Vegas showgirl.
This show has excellent potential. All they need to do is embrace the undeniable racist component that is always present, when we make assumptions based solely on looks . It’s there, like the bigoted elephant in the room, but no one has acknowledged it yet. They can only continue to ignore it for so long. In this world of shock and awe, there is no room for passive racism; it’s go big or go home.
Another glaring problem with the show is that it’s way too easy. They dress everyone up according to their profession. The construction worker has a hardhat on; the athlete is wearing his uniform. Come on! Where’s the fun? Where’s the racism? Why don’t they take the Asian business man and dress him up like a sushi chef, or take the black police officer and put him in a football uniform. Then when the contestant makes the obvious racist choice, Gillette can berate him or her on national television and label them a racist. You can’t even pretend you wouldn’t watch it.
This where is Penn really needs to step up his game. He needs to show his obvious dismay when the contestant assumes that the woman in the nurse’s outfit is a nurse. Penn needs to express his disgust that the contestant assumed that women can’t be doctors. When they think the Asian is the sushi chef, he needs to tell them about all of the contributions Asians have made in the past 50 years. Then point out that if the contestant wasn’t such an obvious racist they would have been able to see through the chefs hat immediatly.
There is also another change that needs to be made: According to the current rules. When the contestant makes a wrong decision, they’re out. That’s gotta change. They can’t allow a guy to make a clearly racist remark and the let him off the hook? That’s not the way it works here in the USA. Pal. Ask Michael Richards. The offending contestant must be forced to finish out the round until they match up everyone’s correct identity. Let’s show no mercy here. There could be special episodes for sweeps week, where they have all the guests be of the same race. Imagine the contestant’s humiliation when he gets yelled at by one of the guests for picking him three times in a row because apparently, they all look alike. Is there any way this wouldn’t be the highest rated unintentional comedy ever?
Another thing that absolutely must stop is the “snappy” little one liners the guests give when they reveal their identity. Like, when the crocodile wrestler says “It’s no croc, I am the crocodile wrestler” or the bodyguard says “That’s right, you’re on the list and I am the bodyguard.” Whoever is writing these should go back to his old job, writing for “According to Jim”.
And while we’re at it, why don’t they stop with the 5 minute dramatic pauses. Is this keeping anyone in suspense? Is anyone going, “Wow, the 6’5, 300 lbs guy with a ponytail wearing a suit was the bodyguard? I thought he was the ballet dancer.” “The guy with alligator shoes, a vest and a Paul Hogan hat was the crocodile wrestler? I thought that’s how detectives dressed these days.”
Just get to the point, this ain’t Deal…………………Or No Deal!, after all.
If these changes are made then, and only then, will this show have any significant entertainment value. For now, a plethora of racist opportunities continue to be squandered every week.
On a scale 1 to 52, I’d give this a 1…as in one more week until it’s off the air.
